Sometimes it's Crazed Peace

You know that emotion that hits you at 2 am? The one that makes you want to pull your hair out? Or possibly make you run out the door screaming (with your fingers in your ears) while you jump into the car and drive to the farthest nearest hotel? If you have recently given birth to a cute bundle of colicky joy then you understand to what I am referring... If not I would like to assure you that these emotions are, I have come to find, completely normal and understandable- to other mothers that is...

Well, back to the fleeing your house in a state of panic because if you don't then you fear for the adorably frustrating child shrieking next to you - this is the state of mind I have found myself on the majority of nights the past few weeks. And here are a few examples as to why that is:
- Middle of the night nursing goes well enough, until the bed is reintroduced
- One minute the wubbanub is helping baby drift off, the next she is spitting it out and whimpering
- The Gripe water successfully passes her out after being administered half the time, but the administering process is full of ear piercing screams
- The Gripe water successfully exacerbates her after being administered the other half of the times
- Mylicon never works only worsens
- Rocking either outs her to sleep or wakes her up even more
- Reflux
- Gas
- Digestion
- Stomach issues
- Burps
- all of which wakes up my toddler who now seems to be suffering from a sort of night terror...

And the results to the afore mentioned statuses = little to no sleep and a highly predictable crying schedule (and no, "crying" does not just refer to the infant's tears). Hence, when moments like these happen in which I find myself awake in the middle of the night, with a baby who can't quite seem to comfort herself, I sometimes have the emotions fill me I described at the beginning of this post...

Tonight, however, I find myself feeling a different emotion I can only accredit to both having had a successful two hour nap earlier this afternoon and having LOTS of prayers lifted up on my behalf (the latter being what I am most grateful for and would ask that those do not cease!) The emotion feels almost fake considering that it is not the norm for this hour of night, at least not for this household, but is delightful all the same. It feels like a lack of emotion honestly- most likely due to the fact that there is no strong urge rising up within me to flee the room in which my child is anxiously fighting sleep.. But you are probably wondering what this fake-like feeling of an emotion is, so I will tell you: it is a calming PEACE that has filled me completely.


Peace is a state of harmony characterized by the lack of violent conflict. Commonly understood as the absence of hostility, PEACE also suggests the existence of healthy or newly healed interpersonal or international relationships, prosperity in matters of social or economic welfare, the establishment of equality, and a working political order that serves the true interests of all.

Recently my dear friend Jessica blessed me tremendously by taking Maddie Emma's newborn photos and our family photos. I have since described her as "The Ultimate Baby Whisperer," and I will tell show you why:

You may find yourself looking at this picture and wondering where the baby I have been describing is. I promise they are one in the same... I think... The perfect embodiment of my current emotion, beautifully captured in my daughter's face.